Keep the Spark..

This is the Inaugural Speech by Chetan Bhagat for the new batch at the Symbiosis BBA program 2008.

Good Morning everyone and thank you for giving me this chance to speak to you. This day is about you. You, who have come to this college, leaving the comfort of your homes (or in some cases discomfort), to become something in your life. I am sure you are excited. There are few days in human life when one is truly elated. The first day in college is one of them. When you were getting ready today, you felt a tingling in your stomach. What would the auditorium be like, what would the teachers be like, who are my new classmates - there is so much to be curious about. I call this excitement, the spark within you that makes you feel truly alive today. Today I am going to talk about keeping the spark shining. Or to put it another way, how to be happy most, if not all the time.

Where do these sparks start? I think we are born with them. My 3-yearold twin boys have a million sparks. A little Spiderman toy can make them jump on the bed. They get thrills from creaky swings in the park. A story from daddy gets them excited. They do a daily countdown for birthday party – several months in advance – just for the day they will cut their own birthday cake.

I see students like you, and I still see some sparks.. But when I see older people, the spark is difficult to find.. That means as we age, the spark fades. People whose spark has faded too much are dull, dejected, aimless and bitter. Remember Kareena in the first half of Jab We Met vs the second half? That is what happens when the spark is lost. So how to save the spark?

Imagine the spark to be a lamp's flame. The first aspect is nurturing- to give your spark the fuel, continuously. The second is to guard against storms.

To nurture, always have goals. It is human nature to strive, improve and achieve full potential. In fact, that is success. It is what is possible for you. It isn't any external measure - a certain cost to company pay package, a particular car or house.

Most of us are from middle class families. To us, having material landmarks is success and rightly so. When you have grown up where money constraints force everyday choices, financial freedom is a big achievement.

But it isn't the purpose of life. If that was the case, Mr. Ambani would not show up for work. Shah Rukh Khan would stay at home and not dance anymore. Steve Jobs won't be working hard to make a better iPhone, as he sold Pixar for billions of dollars already. Why do they do it? What makes them come to work everyday?

They do it because it makes them happy. They do it because it makes them feel alive. Just getting better from current levels feels good. If you study hard, you can improve your rank. If you make an effort to interact with people, you will do better in interviews. If you practice, your cricket will get better. You may also know that you cannot become Tendulkar, yet. But you can get to the next level. Striving for that next level is important.

Nature designed with a random set of genes and circumstances in which we were born. To be happy, we have to accept it and make the most of nature’s design. Are you? Goals will help you do that.

I must add, don't just have career or academic goals. Set goals to give you a balanced, successful life. I use the word balanced before successful. Balanced means ensuring your health, relationships, mental peace are all in good order.

There is no point of getting a promotion on the day of your breakup. There is no fun in driving a car if your back hurts. Shopping is not enjoyable if your mind is full of tensions.

You must have read some quotes - Life is a tough race, it is a marathon or whatever.. No, from what I have seen so far, life is one of those races in nursery school. Where you have to run with a marble in a spoon kept in your mouth. If the marble falls, there is no point coming first. Same with life, where health and relationships are the marble. Your striving is only worth it if there is harmony in your life. Else, you may achieve the success, but this spark, this feeling of being excited and alive, will start to die.

One last thing about nurturing the spark - don't take life seriously. One of my yoga teachers used to make students laugh during classes. One student asked him if these jokes would take away something from the yoga practice. The teacher said - don't be serious, be sincere. This quote has defined my work ever since. Whether its my writing, my job, my relationships or any of my goals. I get thousands of opinions on my writing everyday. There is heaps of praise, there is intense criticism. If I take it all seriously, how will I write? Or rather, how will I live? Life is not to be taken seriously, as we are really temporary here. We are like a pre-paid card with limited validity. If we are lucky, we may last another 50 years. And 50 years is just 2,500weekends. Do we really need to get so worked up? It's ok, bunk a few classes, goof up a few interviews, fall in love. We are people, not programmed devices.

I've told you three things - reasonable goals, balance and not taking it too seriously that will nurture the spark. However, there are four storms in life that will threaten to completely put out the flame. These must be guarded against. These are disappointment, frustration, unfairness and loneliness of purpose.

Disappointment will come when your effort does not give you the expected return. If things don't go as planned or if you face failure. Failure is extremely difficult to handle, but those that do come out stronger. What did this failure teach me? is the question you will need to ask. You will feel miserable. You will want to quit, like I wanted to when nine publishers rejected my first book. Some IITians kill themselves over low grades – how silly is that? But that is how much failure can hurt you.

But it's life. If challenges could always be overcome, they would cease to be a challenge. And remember - if you are failing at something, that means you are at your limit or potential. And that's where you want to be.

Disappointment’s cousin is frustration, the second storm. Have you ever been frustrated? It happens when things are stuck. This is especially relevant in India. From traffic jams to getting that job you deserve, sometimes things take so long that you don't know if you chose the right goal. After books, I set the goal of writing for Bollywood, as I thought they needed writers. I am called extremely lucky, but it took me five years to get close to a release.

Frustration saps excitement, and turns your initial energy into something negative, making you a bitter person. How did I deal with it? A realistic assessment of the time involved – movies take a longtime to make even though they are watched quickly, seeking a certain enjoyment in the process rather than the end result – at least I was learning how to write scripts, having a side plan – I had my third book to write and even something as simple as pleasurable distractions in your life - friends, food, travel can help you overcome it. Remember, nothing is to be taken seriously. Frustration is a sign somewhere, you took it too seriously.

Unfairness - this is hardest to deal with, but unfortunately that is how our country works. People with connections, rich dads, beautiful faces, pedigree find it easier to make it – not just in Bollywood, but everywhere. And sometimes it is just plain luck. There are so few opportunities in India, so many stars need to be aligned for you to make it happen. Merit and hard work is not always linked to achievement in the short term, but the long term correlation is high, and ultimately things do work out. But realize, there will be some people luckier than you.

In fact, to have an opportunity to go to college and understand this speech in English means you are pretty darn lucky by Indian standards. Let's be grateful for what we have and get the strength to accept what we don't. I have so much love from my readers that other writers cannot even imagine it. However, I don't get literary praise. It's ok. I don't look like Aishwarya Rai, but I have two boys who I think are more beautiful than her. It's ok. Don't let unfairness kill your spark..

Finally, the last point that can kill your spark is isolation. As you grow older you will realize you are unique. When you are little, all kids want Ice cream and Spiderman. As you grow older to college, you still are a lot like your friends. But ten years later and you realize you are unique. What you want, what you believe in, what makes you feel, may be different from even the people closest to you. This can create conflict as your goals may not match with others. . And you may drop some of them. Basketball captains in college invariably stop playing basketball by the time they have their second child. They give up something that meant so much to them. They do it for their family. But in doing that, the spark dies. Never, ever make that compromise. Love yourself first, and then others.

There you go. I've told you the four thunderstorms - disappointment, frustration, unfairness and isolation. You cannot avoid them, as like the monsoon they will come into your life at regular intervals. You just need to keep the raincoat handy to not let the spark die.

I welcome you again to the most wonderful years of your life. If someone gave me the choice to go back in time, I will surely choose college. But I also hope that ten years later as well, you eyes will shine the same way as they do today. That you will Keep the Spark alive, not only through college, but through the next 2,500 weekends. And I hope not just you, but my whole country will keep that spark alive, as we really need it now more than any moment in history. And there is something cool about saying - I come from the land of billion sparks.

Monotony of Daily Routine !!

No I am not talking about work, but the three hour travel back and forth to office...Same roads, same car (OK!! Cab), same driver....and the worst part getting past the same traffic.. I did try to do some innovative stuff everyday, but slowly everything faded and finally back to sleeping and dawdling on the way to work, not that all the sms’s and phone calls helped a lot coz after few days, everyone were like ‘Don’t you have anything better to do??’…Aah!! Well if someone were in my shoes they might well get the answer themselves..

Anyways, ask me anything on route I can probably name every single restaurant, gas station or movie theater there..What useful knowledge?? Well, not that I have a choice avoiding them. There’s this guy whom I see everyday perennially smoking in the same place, same posture ...don no what’s up with him? Everything just seems a part of the monotonous routine .. Wonder how people go through this for years….For I call it waste of time, however the wise men call it EXPERIENCE!!! Phew!! Whatever….

Hilarious stuff...

Aah! Short of words to describe this one.... Just watch it.

Really Achieving Your Childhood Dreams

This is a lecture given by Randy, and it was a part of Carnegie Mellon University’s “last lecture” series, where professors gave the lecture they’d give if, hypothetically, they knew they were going to die. One of the most Inspirational speeches ever... Do read it fully :)

1. You can overcome weaknesses.

In high school, I always had a hard time with the books I had to read for English class. I would read the book and the Cliffs Notes, spend way more time studying than anyone else, and still get a D on the test. It made me feel like a complete retard. One teacher drew a frowny face on my test when I missed three questions in a row. Another teacher wrote “surely you jest” on my essay.
Fortunately there were enough other assignments in English class to prop up my grades, but what about the verbal section of the SAT? There was no way of faking my way through it. My top choice for college, the University of Virginia, was the number one public school in the country at the time. From what I heard, you needed a 600 verbal to have a good chance of getting in. When I first took the PSAT, I only got 450.
This wasn’t fair. Why should I not get into the school I wanted to go to just because I didn’t know what “exigency” and “sybarite” meant, or because some reading passages were so boring I forgot the beginning by the time I got to the end? But what could I do? I studied.
Although it wasn’t fun to practice something I hated, I found that I did get a lot better by memorizing endless vocabulary words and taking many practice tests. Starting with a 450 on my first attempt at the PSAT, I got 470 on my second attempt. Then 540 on my first practice SAT. Then 610 on the real SAT. Then 710 on the GRE. I finished high school with a 4.02 GPA, and I didn’t just get into the University of Virginia; I got in early decision as an Echols Scholar (roughly the top 5% of the incoming class). Not bad for someone who could barely read.

2. Still, it’s usually better to focus on your strengths.

If you’re naturally bad at something, it might take a tremendous amount of effort to become mediocre. But if you’re naturally good at something, it’s relatively easy to become great. It might take a sustained effort over a period of years, but your odds of success are fairly high if you’re truly committed. It’s much easier to stay motivated when you’re good, you know you’re getting even better, and you enjoy what you’re doing.
Life is hard enough already, so play to your strengths. Do you think Tiger Woods should run for president and Hillary Clinton should take up professional golf? They’ll probably get better results the other way around.
Some weaknesses need to be overcome. Let’s say you show talent for being a corporate executive, but you’re not computer literate. You should develop some basic proficiency, so you know how to use email and how to Google something. But you shouldn’t try to become a power user. In the time it takes you to learn as much as today’s 14 year olds know, you could have devised strategies that would save your company millions of dollars.
Your effectiveness depends on your ability to patch up any critical weaknesses, while capitalizing on your strengths.

3. Laughter is the best medicine, but don’t wait until you’re sick.

“There is no greater pleasure than to laugh, no higher purpose than to bring the joy of laughter to others.”
- made up quote, let’s say, England, 1854
As Ferris Bueller said, “Life moves by pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.” There are funny things happening all around us, all the time. To let them pass unnoticed is a tragic waste. I can’t stand to be around people who never laugh. Laughing makes life way more fun for you, for everyone you come in contact with, and it’s good for your health. What could possibly be more important?

4. Life’s supposed to be way too hard.

I don’t know what particular challenges you’re going through, but surely there are a lot of them. Maybe you’re going through a divorce. Maybe you have health problems. Maybe you’re fighting an addiction. Maybe you hate your job. Maybe you’re overworked, underpaid, and unappreciated. Many people feel like their life is going nowhere, and absolutely everything seems to be going wrong. Life sucks, I get it.
But a lot of the dissatisfaction that people feel comes from comparing their life to some rosy picture in their head. I think the real danger with school is that it teaches people that life is going to be easy. If you get good grades, then you’ll get into a good college, get a good job, earn a good salary, have a big house, wonderful spouse, and 2.5 beautiful kids, and everything will be just peachy, right?
This is what people expect, and they’re surprised when it doesn’t automatically happen. They put in some effort and it still doesn’t happen. They put in even more effort and it still doesn’t happen, and now they think the whole world is against them. But no, that’s just how it’s supposed to be. Life’s not fair, and no one has it easy.
Life is a struggle for all successful people!!

5. Be insanely useful.

I don’t remember where I first heard this phrase, but it’s golden. You’d have to be insane to be useful, right? Why not do the bare minimum like everyone else? It’s easier to be dead weight, isn’t it?
In reality, you don’t have to go the extra mile to stand out. Just going the first mile is unusual. Actually, just leaving the starting gate is above average.
But beyond just doing what can be reasonably expected of anyone, why not go that extra mile? I’m not saying to let other people walk over you, but in many cases the extra mile doesn’t take much effort. If your boss asks you for the status of the ABC report, instead of just saying “I don’t know, that’s not my thing,” spend two minutes finding out what the deal is, and let them know. It’s worth spending two minutes to come off looking like part of the solution instead of part of the problem.
When the receptionist at my workplace orders lunch for everyone, she sends out an email asking people to come by and sign up for what they want. But they never do. They wait until the “last call” a couple of days later, or wait until it’s too late and then complain that they didn’t get what they want. When those emails come out, I’m always the first to sign up, because it’s easier for everyone to just do it and be done. And the receptionist is extra nice to me because of it. Just for signing up for lunch!

6. People change, but that’s OK.

I realized that people come in and out of our lives all the time, and even if someone sticks around, your relationship will eventually change.
Think of the people you spend most of your time with. For most of you, this will be immediate family and coworkers. Out of all your coworkers, how many of them did you know five years ago? How many of them will you still be in touch with five years from today? Those relationships have a purpose for now, but they’re not meant to last.
Even among your close friends and family members, your relationships will change. This is especially true if you don’t have regular contact with them. Childhood friends of yours who you now see only a couple of times a year seem different now, don’t they? That’s because they are different. Or maybe you don’t realize that you’re the one who’s different now.
Everyone you know has a purpose in your life, but in most cases you’ll eventually outgrow that purpose and need to move on. That’s the way it’s supposed to be.

7. You are a god among gods.

This idea comes from The Science Of Being Great by Wallace D. Wattles, who wrote:
“You are a god, but you are among gods…Think of yourself as a perfect being among perfect beings, and meet every person as an equal, not as either superior or an inferior.”
Don’t become a victim of self-sabotage. It’s useless to tell yourself that you can’t do something, because you’ll only try to prove yourself right. You are a god, and you are capable of much more than you think.
But you are also among gods. Don’t be condescending or disrespectful to others, no matter who they are. You’re not better than anyone else, because they’re gods too.

8. Rocky is the best movie ever.

Easily my favorite movie, it’s impossible not to be inspired by this story of a hopeless underdog taking his one shot at glory. There’s never a dull moment as Rocky strives to redeem his wasted life, free Adrian from her social prison, save Paulie from the burden of taking care of her, and give Mickey something to live for again.
When a stroke of fate gives Rocky a chance at the world heavyweight championship, he has no delusions about his likelihood of winning. All he wants is to go the distance, to hear that bell ring and still be standing, and know for the first time in his life that he’s not just another bum from the neighborhood. And after he does, he doesn’t want to be interviewed, he doesn’t want to know who won, he just wants Adrian.
Sylvester Stallone wrote the script after watching the second-rate boxer Chuck Wepner nearly go the distance against Muhammad Ali. Despite having an incredibly hard time finding someone willing to produce it with him in the lead role, he persisted. Complications forced last-minute changes to the script, and early critics panned the movie for bad acting, bad directing, and being overly sentimental. Still he persisted, being the only one who believed in what he had.
The producers panicked when it went over budget at $1.1 million, thinking they would never get their money back. But Rocky shattered all expectations to pull in $117 million and receive 10 Oscar nominations with 3 wins, including Best Picture.

9. Don’t die with your music still in you.

The one thing I can promise you is that you will die. Maybe not today, and maybe not tomorrow, but the day is closer than you think. Don’t waste a second waiting for your real life to begin. The time is now.
I’d rather fail and have the dignity of having tried, than give up and be a total loser and have it be my fault. I won’t die with my music still in me, and you shouldn’t either.

And Finally!!!!

It's almost an year since I created this blog and thats about it.. All this while I have been figuring out what a blog is all about and what do people have to write about everyday.., but then, after reading soo many recently, from Aamir’s to the Big B’s to Chinmayi's to Raymond.CC's.. I figured out it isn’t a big deal….Jus keep it simple..

P.S. : Well I created this one way before all this hype about blogging and stuff, but then its now that I have really started or atleast plan to do so…